New Years Eve

"It only happens once a year: New Year's Eve. It's a time when hopeless can be romantic, and a resolution can become a revelation. And when one night can change everything. Stop and reflect on the year that has gone by. To remember both our triumphs and our missteps - our promises made, and broken. The times we opened ourselves up to great adventures - or closed ourselves down, for fear of getting hurt. Because that's what New Year's is all about: getting another chance. A chance to forgive, to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more. And stop worrying about 'what if' and start embracing what would be. So when that ball drops at midnight - and it will drop - let's remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other. And not just tonight but all year long."

Hope you all have a great year ahead. I intend on doing so - definitely. Not saying it's going to be "my year" but I sure as hell am going to try my hardest to make it a great one.

xox

Haven't written in a while! Been on holiday and stuff. Urrrrm... it's new years eve - wooooo :-) Going to do a post later, may do it now, hmm comtemplating! Ohhh, I got a Blackberry now, ahahaha, never in a million years did I see myself with one, but yeah got one! But it's for different reasons to most people though, so its not really bandwagon'ny - that's not even a word!

Yeah, deuces! For a bit anyway

"I feel a lot of life is distasteful and embarrassing. And you just push through it. You fix what you can, and you let time pass."

Excited

SO many people that I wish were much more famous than they actually are! But then again, I hate the fact that I'll probably end up resenting the artists when they get big because their music will become overplayed and just plain annoying ): But still, I love Kaleem Taylor's voice/music soooo much, he's actually adorable. Was just watching him on 103.6fm's USTREAM (don't know what to call it).

♥

THOUSAND VIEWS ON MY BLOG IN THE LAST MONTH OR SO, thanks to those who actually read it! Never knew that many people cared aha so yeah, THANKS!

HEY! To those who actually read this, but then I just realised that for you to be on here, you must be in some form interested in my blog :') Crazy moment of realisation, aha. 

Urrrrmmm, so basically there's this kid and he like BEGGED me to share his video on my blog because he think I'm just toooooo school for cool ;) - yeah I said it, too school for cool. Hahaha, I actually amuse myself stooopid amounts. As obvious, I'm in a really weird mood!

Okay, on a serious note, this guy in school - don't know how to introduce him - does video blogs, which can be quite funny, and to quote "sometimes you can just knock a bitch out" hahaha, well something like that. His name is Ryan and yeah, watch his new video then check the other ones out, doubt you'd regret doing so! 

Oh and follow him on Twitter aswell - @FuckMossy
Here is the link for the actual video - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOJg1k4-J8s

P.S. Don't forget to follow me! ;)

PEEEAAACCEEE

In one of those craaaazzyy moods!

"But that was the problem with having the answers. It was only after you gave them that you realized they sometimes weren't what people wanted to hear. "

I cannot, for the life of me, get to sleep. I don't know know why. Actually, part of me is worried that if I fall asleep, I will wake up late for work. Which is worrying as I'm new but then again if I don't sleep I will be dead at work. So I've set like four alarms in the hope that at least one of them wakes me up. Listening to some Kaleem to chill out, may calm me to get some sleeeeeeep.

Deuces ;)

I look so weird in this, but I finally decided to do the video! Sound like I may actually cry towards the end, but I wasn't, don't know why it came out like this! Urrrrm, so yeah, follow me on Twitter @marditeej :) You won't regret it! Hahah

Might start adding some C O L O U R to my blog, it's looking a bit dead.

Really would do the vlog whatever now, but I just woke up, feel like death and yeah cba really.

Stopped posting because I got put in a dangerously bad mood, courtesy of my brother. Went to sleep it off, smartest thing to do I guess.

This is Kaleem Taylor - spoke about him a couple of posts ago. Saw him live at 1Xtra and I can't put into words how much I am now in love with his voice! It's just so original, everyone should definitely have a listen :) He has a new EP out called Smooth, it's soooo good - not gonna lie!

Until I have the time to rant the last three months of my life on here, I'm just going to be posting looads of random things!

By the way, when I do post whatever long thing, it ain't gon' be amazing aha, it's probably me just going ooooon about myself, asper! Oh and I'm working this weekend, well Saturday, so I'll probably do the post Sunday :D

DEUCES

I'm so lazy, it's actually not right.. I know I should write the blog post but I just cba, think I might try and vlog it :') Just need the time to do it. Anyhoos, I'm off again, bizzzz

P.S. It may not mean much to y'all but Kaleem Taylor is following me on Twitter. In case you didn't know, he is amaaaaazing, saw him at 1Xtra Live, been in love ever since! Oh and you should check out his music, it's actually original and it's basically amazing aha.

So yeah, deeuucceess

Haven't blogged in what seems like forever, wish I had time to! But I will sometime this week when I'm free, been soooo busy with school. It's weird how I'm not even that busy, but when I'm free blogging is not number one! I will catchup sometime this week though :' ) It's weird howI was just looking at the thing that shows me people that look at my blog and where they look at it from and there are people in America that actually read my blog in America, crraaaazzzyyy! But yeah, I'm gone, got two essays to complete, damnit.

PEACE!

JUBILANT

Yeaaah, jubilant is the word.
HEEEEEEEEYYYY WORLD.
GOOD MORNING STARSHINE, THE EARTH SAYS HELLO.
SOO, can't really remember when last I posted, I think it was on my birthday or the day before, actually I think it's the day before because I remember typing something along the lines of 'last day as jail-bait' or something along those lines. Hahaha, I'm so silly. Damn, that sounds gay but can't be bothered to change it, so instead I'm just writing more - slyly making my post look longer than it actually is, ha. Am I not a BOSS?
Urmm, I'd like to say I'm happy happy happy - well at this moment in time I'm quite happy - because in the real aspect of things there's not really any prominent sad things.
I started this in the morning but then had to go to my brother's graduation thing at Uni, it was alright, but I still can't get over their accents over here! But still, Newcastle is pretty cool and the uni's building aswell is pretty don'ish. Is it wrong that whilst I'm in Newcastle, I'm kinda on the look out for some of the Geordie Shore characters? Haha, really hoping that I'd see at least one of them, that'd be freaaakkiinnnggg raaadddd.
Today's been a good day so far, just chillin' till eight because everyone is asleep ("resting") and then at eight man's going outt! It better be good, else I will not be happy. It's good being out of Northampton for a few days, new environment and that is pretty cool.
So, I've been reading this book, well I just started I've had it for months and just decided that I may aswell read it quick aha. As I was saying, yeah, I've been reading this book called Sole Survivors and it's about familicides, which is when people kill their families, usually kids or aorund that age anyway. Even though it's pretty crazy, it's so insightful but some of the psychology behind the sentencing of some of the people is ridiculous because, a lot of the time they just class them as insane because what they have done is something that doesn't fit the criteria of 'normal' therefore meaning that before they even talk to them they've already been classed as crazy because 'no sane person would do such a thing'. The stories of people who have actually killed their families aswell are CRAZY! Some guy blew up his mum, brother and half of his sister. Weird as stuff.
Feel like I've just gone on, which I probably have but enjoy! May post later, don't know, depends on how late I'm up :)


^seeing this later, hopefully that is.

"I know some day you will wake up as lonely as I am 'cause fate works both ways"
ox

HI THERE. I knoww I haven't written in a while but it's quite simply down to the fact that I haven't been able to access this site, the only way was by my phone and that was crap as you can evidently tell by my last two posts. However, it's not like I have a blog that would have been missed ;) hehe.
BIRTHDAY TOMORROW! Strangely, I'm not excited for it, actually, I'm sleepy right now, doubt I'll be awake later. It sucks that I get ill the day before my birthday :-/ I've been sniffling and sneezing all day, and if you've heard my sneeze you'd know how much of a sucky thing it is. I hate it when I've got a blocked nose, freaking does my head in. Surprisingly though, I've had a good day even though I was ill, cooooool. Have to go in to school tomorrow, for 'signing out' sucks, big time. Especially the fact that we have to go in at like 9 o'clock damn.
Just realised, this will be my last post as jail-bait ;) iJOKE! It will be my last post as a minor though, which rooooocccckkkssss!
Urm, not much has gone on since my last post, which by the way I don't even remember. My sleep pattern hasn't got much better, if anything it's gotten worse, staying up for two days and shizz. However, because I'm ill, I'm already feeling sleepy, but that seems to be changing.
Not looking forward to going to school tomorrow because I have to find a bunch of books and stuff that we got from school in like year whatever, pretty pointless and if we don't find it, apparently we have to pay. What a joke o.O
Anyhoos, off to wacth some TV, so yeah bizz homies.
Lastly, there's always that freaking hard time when you have to make the decision of either trying harder or giving up. It's so hard and really getting me frustrated. Especially when it's a case of people sending mixed signals, I really don't get it, it freaking gets on my nerves, and the fact that I can't help it, sucks.



"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years"

ox

jffiuv

Can't sleep as per. so im gracing yall with a post. cba for correcting punctuation and shizz because its unnecessary effort when im on my phone. because i cant sleep ive taken some sleeping tablets, i can kinda feel them working or it may just be me telling myself that because i want them to work now. i need to get a grip of my sleep, its annoying how regardless what time i sleep i wake up the same damn time. long story short, its been a good day, sorted mum and dads room out before theyre back and had basketball, caught too much joke then hahahah. shout out to mass fags makeda and rochelle, had a funny time tonight. cant be arsed to write more so peace out homiess! ox

Insomniac

G'morning is the technical term, so g'morning it is! I swear I actually suffer from insomnia to a certain extent. I've been in bed for aaages and I just can't seem to get any sleep hence why I'm posting something. I actually don't get my body and brain because I thought the lack of sleep was due to having my phone with me but even if I didn't have my phone I'd still be bluddy awake, looks like I need to get to a doctor or something to sort me out and tell me wtf is wrong with me hah. This isn't going to be a proper post because it's awkward tryna post something from my phone ha. Thank the lord for autosave as this just closed and if it didn't save I wouldn't be writing another one. My phone is playing up so I'mma just go ahead and leave. I was reading through my old posts and wow I say some quotable shizz sometimes, surprising myself haha. Can't space out my text cause it doesn't fully "support"my phone, so niiigghhhtt : Even though I'll still be awake. It's weird soooo weird not going to school, I could really get used to this lifestyle hehe ;) Peace! ox

Good Evening

HEYhelloHI.
Urrmm, felt like posting because I'm bored and mood keeps fluctuating like there's no tomorrowm damn! It's my last exam tomorrow, looking forward to that because from them on I'm freeeeee, you getz?
I've come to a decision, one that's based on recent experience, I am NOT going to try with people if it doesn't get reciprocated, I ain't no mug, foo. Especially if I'm trying to make our 'friendship' better and all you're doing is trying to make me shut up, hell noooo do I have time for such muckery. Man's got bigger fish to fry! I neeeed to stop using chavvy language because people actually take me seriously when I do hahaha it's a joke -.- I HATE exam leave! The only good thing about is that I'm feeling older, however it's cons are waaayy more than the pros. Being sat at home doing nothing everyday is boring, especially now that I don't have exams so I can't just sit and revise! I can't go to the court and ball on my own everyday aswell, succkkss. I'd much rather be in school doing absolutely nothing than be at home bored.
Spent the last week, just being bored. Every night before my exam I sat there trying to cram the whole text book, haha, surprisingly it works because it's not like I'm freshly learning stuff, thank God for that! But I definitely have to work hard in sixth form, no lazing about like the past five years! Ohmydiddydays five years hahaha.
ohohohoh, I've finally got a new phone, after TWO years with the ancient one I had, thank the lord! I was buzzziiinnnggg, hehe. Happy I got it before my birthday though so I can ask for somehting else for my birthday, braaapp. Which by the way is in three weeks ;) 4th of July, hehe. Now, I'm in a random happy mood, which I'm sure will change in the next few minutes/hours, unpredictable stuff I tell ya! Urmm, Science exams tomorrow, buzzing, NOT. Just can't wait for it to be over done with, I'm having to learn stuff from year nine all over again -.- damn. There's a CVL game tomorrow, looking forward to it, nice end to stressfulish week.
I swear I actually wonder why I call some people friends, SUCH a waste of my time. Soooo many people I need to edit out of my life but I am just longing it out because I am a wasteman! (again, with the chav talk, neeeed to sort it out!)

Bored of writing, hope this has occupied a good few minutes of someone's time, hehe ;) More people need to get blogs because it's getting boring following just one person, because all I see is their posts and yeah, more people need a blog, like now. Tumblr sux. It's just pictures -__-
Niiggghhhttt. Dunno why I said night because I know I'm still gonna be up for the next few hours, ha.



Tonight's picture is random, just because.

'Happiness is a direction, not a destination'

ox

FUNNY

AND PUT ON YOUR DANCING SHOES.

Howdy,
So it's 23:38 pm and I'm bored enough to write a new post. Erm, not much has been going on, just "revising" for exam. Looking back now I wish I'd tried with my lessons because (not being cocky) I'd have got all A*s no joke, ahaha. Ahh well, the past is the past. Just working a bit to get my good grades now.
Had THE most bullshxt exam on Monday, Edexcel are horse guys, putting goddamn dodgy arse questions in the paper. However, apparently the grade boundaries have been moved down, so hopefully I've got the grade I want. Another Maths paper tomorrow, they better not try and weird stuff like they did last time, else, I'd be royall PISSED. Grr. I've done some revision for it. Went to Kiana's for revision. Spent like 2/3 hours actually revising and the remaining 2/3 hours were spent on Youtube, watchin funny videos and trying to learn the words to Chris Brown's Look At Me Now, keeeen times!
Urm, looking forward to summer, I'm away for like SIX weeks, not sure how to feel about that. It better be goood :D I'm actually not joking, by the time we get back to school in September, I think I may be brain dead by then, no school for like THREE MONTHS! Crazy shxt, haha!
Decided to take on life with a less serious approach because.. I'm AWESOME, I don't need to be all serious for peeps to realise that. Can't believe I just said peeps, hahah, what a goon. LOL jk, I'm still great. Yeah, I know 'arrogant much?' hardly, if you don't love yourself, how do you expect people to love you? Which brings me on to my next point, I've realised I've actually got a big ego ahaha. However, it's not one that gets in the way of who I am and the respect I give to people. If you give me respect you get respect in return, right?
Urrmm, started using Twitter properly, getting the hang of it and I actually find myself using hashtags on Facebook ahah, it probably annoys everyone but hey, I just don't give a fuuuhh. Twitter is so good, wish I'd been using it much longer; the weird bit though is the randomers following me, but hey no biggie. Looking at this post, I've actually written a fair bit without actually saying much, weird aha. Looking forward to next week Friday, exams are over and I'm chilling with my dons! Actually buzzing for it, no joke. Now I'm randomly in a weird mood, casually just ruining people's statuses because it's funny, haha.
In a really happy mood, hope it carries on till tomorrow! It better :'
I wish more people had a blog instead of Tumblr. I refuse to jump on the bandwagon with that one, just going to stick to good ol' Blogger, it's been good to me, aha.



'We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid. So are regrets'

Accomplishment

WE MADE IT.
2006 -2011
Feels like an accomplishment.
However, it is scary to think that I've been in Northampton Academy for FIVE years, even though it really doesn't feel like it, aha. It's been a good run and I'm genuinely going to miss the school. Oh and, school actually finished on Friday, but as per me being late with everything my post happend to be late, ha.
A year end is neither an end or a beginning, but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us. Pesonally speaking, it's more of a beginning, a beginning of the rest of my life. If I had to do it over again, I would choose the same set people over again :') Just have a few more exams left then I have a freakishly LONG summer! Looking forward to sixthform though!
It's crazy that I'm actually growing up so quick! Not in a sense of doing things that aren't appropriate for my age. I mean, that I'm actually finished school. The prospect of the future actually kind of scares me to be frank. It's scary that my future is in my hands and whatever decisions I make determine what my future holds. I am trying to achieve a lot and make the right decisions, but it's inevitable that mistakes will be made, but they aren't mistakes if I learn from them; they'll merely be learning curves in my life.
There's nothing more interesting to write about! I need to start putting stuff up as soon as I think them, not three days after when I can't be bothered, HA.

Thank you Northampton Academy Year 11's for making the past five years of my life enjoyable. It's been one hell of a roller coaster. However, I wish I had gotten to know people better as opposed to right at the end.




'And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.'

ox

Abdicated

I haven't written on this in so long. The funny thing is that I've thought of doing it but never actually brought myself to doing it. It's not that funny, but hey ho. It's been like five months, weird, totally abandoning my blog.
Frankly, not a lot has changed in terms of the world but I seem to have a better grasp on what I want and I'm altering the things I don't want in life. Slowly but surely I'm getting there. It's amazing as I go through all kinds of feelings and experiences in my 'journey' through life - happiness, surprise, sadness - I hold this question as a guiding light: 'What do I really need right now to be happy?' What I seem to come to changes each time, but things like love, connection and kindness seem to be what pops up that'll really make me happy in any sort of enduring way.
I know I'm probably repeating myself but I really am starting to realise the people that I need and should have around me and I'm working towards achieving that, haha.
Hm, I hate it when you want to do something but you're so scared of the potential consequences that it stops you from going ahead and doing it even though it could possibly be one of the best things you've ever done. Confusing? I know. Gosh, I just wish I could read minds at times.
Urm, exams have started, and it's my last week in school. Four days left: Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. It's weird how, strangely, I'm actually going to miss wearing the school uniform and being in 'secondary' school aha. I know I'm staying in sixth form but stiilll. I may actually cry on Friday aha, it's going to be a crazy week. People are signing books already, kinda cool.
There's a lot I could write but to be honest, it isn't worth the time aha. I'll try and write as much as I can, so then I can write 'loads'. However, not everyday for the next few weeks due to the exams. Which are crazy, I have EIGHT science exams! Damn, that sucks. Big time. English Literature and Humanities exam tomorrow, hopefully I do well. I actually pray that all this work I'm putting in for the exams are worth it, else I'd be highly pissed. Ha.
GOOD-LUCK TO EVERYONE THAT HAS EXAMS :)


'Sometimes you need a second chance, because time wasn't ready for the first one.'

ox